The Little Voice
by monicaa of the desert
Summary: Sasuke thinks about Naruto after he leaves Konoha. Contains Yaoi references, if you don't go for that sort of thing, don't bother reading this.


**Title: **The Little Voice

**Warnings: **Yaoi, Implied Sex (le gasp!)

**Disclaimer:** Naruto and all of his friends are the property of Masashi Kishimoto. I'm just allowed to play with them

--

Sasuke wondered where he had gone wrong.

For most of his remembered life, all he could think of was killing Itachi. His life's dream was to kill his own brother. At first, when he joined the ninja academy, he just wanted to live up to Itachi's image, so that he could gain his father's respect. He trained harder than anyone else in his class, and excelled. But still his father would not acknowledge him.

When he finally did gain his father's respect, he lost his brother's. Sasuke remembered his brother acting oddly towards him, and his father. A great tension settled over the Uchiha compound. The tension stayed until-

No. Even now, he couldn't think about that horrible night. Blood everywhere, bodies on the ground... and his parents-

All of these memories were painful. Sasuke didn't think any of these memories were as painful as seeing his brother, alive and well, standing there as his killing his entire family was something he did every day.

--

After that, he withdrew into himself. He went through school not really noticing any of the other students. He barely noticed Sakura and Ino, who always seemed to be following him around, and squealing when he said anything.

He noticed Naruto though. Of course, Naruto made himself incredibly difficult to ignore. Everything from his bright blonde hair, his incredibly loud voice, his terrible taste in color coordination, and his never-ending optimism. Naruto was the only person who managed to elbow his way into Sasuke's dark world. The thing that really annoyed Sasuke was the fact that he hated Naruto. And Naruto hated him.

Over the years, he grew to hate Naruto even more. He hated that Naruto was so bloody cheerful. He hated Naruto's bright orange clothes. He hated ramen solely because Naruto loved it. He hated that his first kiss had been with Naruto.

And the thing that he hated most about Naruto was that Naruto was his best friend.

Neither boy would admit it. Despite the fact that they always fought, and competed over everything, Naruto was his best friend.

When the chunnin exams rolled around, Sasuke was very confident in how he would do. He was the top of his class for heaven's sake! He barely thought about how Sakura would do; she was strong, she could take care of herself.

Naruto... well, Naruto he wasn't so sure about. For all his optimism and strength, he was actually kind of stupid.

Still, all three signed up. After the written exam, they were led to the Forest of Death. Team seven received their scroll, went to the assigned entrance, and the mission began.

There, he thought, was probably where things started to go wrong.

Sasuke was obsessed with power. He had a superiority complex, he knew, and he also knew that he would do absolutely anything to gain enough power to kill Itachi.

It was in this frame of mind that he was seduced by Orochimaru's words. Orochimaru would give him power. Orochimaru would help him defeat Itachi.

Yes, it was at about that point when everything went pear-shaped.

The weeks after he received the curse mark from Orochimaru were a haze. He remembered training with Kakashi-sensei, fighting Gaara, seeing his brother again... and almost killing Naruto.

Yes, that thought stood out the most in his hazy memory. The battle with Naruto. Many things, many emotions were brought out into play during this fight. When he thought back on the words he exchanged with Naruto, he learned that he wasn't the only one hurting over the years. Naruto didn't even have a family to mourn, and the demon sealed inside him...

When Naruto was finally down, completely unconscious, and absolutely defeated, Sasuke remembered one important detail that was the last act of his former self.

He didn't kill Naruto.

He left him lying on the ground, and was gone.

--

For the first few months in Orochimaru's secret village, Sasuke was on edge. He half expected the loud, knuckleheaded ninja to burst in at any moment, screaming something about Coming To Take You Home Sasuke-Teme!! Dattebayo!!

He wasn't sure how he felt about that notion. He didn't know if he wanted Naruto to find him, beat some sense into him, and drag him back to Konoha by his ankle, or just┘ leave. Give up on him completely.

Sasuke knew that wasn't an option. Sasuke knew that Naruto would never give up on him. That fleeting notion died as soon as he thought it, and his old self is pushed into the back of his mind.

After the first few months, he gave up on Naruto. That small portion of his mind, that small fleeting portion, the one that whispered to him as he slept, didn't. In the beginning, that part of his brain whispered constantly, in all his daily activities. It whispered to him while he was training, saying things about how Naruto would show up any day now, he would come, he would be there. To light up his life again.

Without Naruto elbowing into his personal world, without that small orb of light, his life was getting increasingly dark.

Naruto never left his thoughts, though. Every once and a while, when Kabuto, or Orochimaru-sama would say or do something, he would think of what Naruto would say in this situation. When this happened, he would have to excuse himself, and go have a small laugh in his private quarters.

Though... as the year drew out, Naruto's voice began to fade. He no longer put forth his opinion in the confines of Sasuke's mind. As Naruto's voice faded, so did the other voice.

One day, it disappeared all together. He got up, and went about his daily duties without once hearing the voice whispering about today was the day that Naruto would show.

By that time, Sasuke was too far-gone to notice. The last time he remembered hearing Naruto's voice it was when it was commenting on the new outfit that he had to wear. It said something about it being a man-dress, or something.

Now, the voice only whispered in his sleep. Sometimes Sasuke would dread falling asleep at night, because he didn't know what kind of dreams he would have that night.

Sometimes it would be replays of the fight between him and Naruto. Sometimes it would be scenes from his childhood, remembering the painful night he lost his family. In most of his dreams, Itachi would grin at him, and taunt him like he used to as a child.

Naruto was in all of his dreams. When it was a childhood dream, Naruto would be standing right beside him, as a young child, grinning his bright innocent smile. When they fought in his dreams, Naruto looked different. Sometimes he would look forlorn, and sad. Sometimes feral, and angry. In one dream, Sasuke actually killed him. And, he remembered, as he moved in for the kill, Naruto smiling at him as he died.

Night after night, these dreams plagued him, until he finally took some bloody sleeping pills to keep the dreams at bay.

This worked for about a year, then one night he didn't take any sleeping pills, just flopped down on his bed, fully clothed, and was asleep before he hit the pillow.

_"Oh God, Sasuke..."_

_Naruto was writhing under Sasuke's touch. His blonde hair was mussed, and his whisker-marked cheeks were flushed. Sasuke trailed his fingers down Naruto's naked chest, and a quiet moan escaped the blondes swollen lips. Sasuke smirked at the blonde before leaning down and licking the shell of Naruto's ear._

_"What do you want me to do, Naruto-kun?" He whispered, making him shiver._

_"Please, Sasu... I want..." Naruto's hips bucked upwards, making them both groan at the friction created-_

It was at this point in the dream when Sasuke awoke, sweating profusely, shaky, and incredibly incredibly horny.

The dream replayed itself in his mind throughout the day, completely ruining his concentration. Every time he made to beat his sparring partner, or snap a smart-ass comment at Kabuto, Naruto's flushed face would swim across the front of his mind, and any comments would die in his throat.

The dreams continued for about a week before Sasuke came to horrifying conclusion that he was gay. There didn't seem to be any way of avoiding the fact, so he chose to ignore it, and continue with his training.

Two years passed, and Sasuke was now sixteen years old, and incredibly powerful.

Two years after Sasuke left Konoha, he left Orochimaru. The ritual that Orochimaru used to transfer to Sasuke's body backfired, and instead of taking over Sasuke, it completely consumed Orochimaru.

Sasuke left the hidden village in search of his brother, so he could finally kill the bastard once and for all.

The voice was only faint now, barely noticeable. When Sasuke drifted in the realms of near-sleep, he could hear it murmuring without much conviction. If he really concentrated he could hear little words forming, "_Konoha... love... Naruto... home... safe..._" But he always pushed them away. He had forgotten Naruto's voice, his face, and his warmth. Sasuke's world was completely dark now.

--

He found Itachi. He found his brother, like he said he would. There was a lot of fighting, and a lot of words exchanged. But, finally, Itachi was dead at his feet.

Sasuke staggered a few steps away from his dead brother, and collapsed to the ground, completely drained of all energy...

--

"_I think he might be around here somewhere_"

Sasuke emerged from his unconsciousness to hear a familiar voice.

"_Are you sure Naruto?_"

Naruto. That name was familiar? Who was Naruto? Naruto┘ friend? Did Sasuke have friends?

"_I'm sure Sakura. I really am this time._"

It was Naruto's voice, he was sure of it. But Sasuke hadn't heard it in so long, he wasn't sure anymore.

Sasuke opened his eyes. Why was he the ground...? Shaking, he pushed himself to his feet, and swayed a bit before steadying himself. He had to leave, and quickly. He was too weak for another fight.

The small voice of his former self pushed forward faintly,_ they probably won't find you... why don't sit for a while? Rest?_

Yes, thought Sasuke, I should rest. Rest is what I need. He staggered up the small set of stairs, and stepped lightly over the body of his brother. He lowered himself into the chair that his brother had sat in not hours ago. Slouching down, he propped one foot on Itachi's body. His eyes closed and he smiled grimly.

Sasuke sat quietly; they won't find me, will they? He asked himself.

_Of course they won't. Now... just rest for a minute..._

Sasuke thought for a minute that this small voice might be lying to him, making him wait so that they would find him in his weakened state, but it was quickly dismissed. Not part of him wanted to see them again... Not one...

Sasuke could hear footsteps on the stone floor, and he heard them stop. He stayed completely still, but his fingers tightened on the arms of the stone chair.

"Is-is... is that Itachi?" He heard someone whisper quietly, _Sakura_, the small voice supplied.

"Sasuke." Naruto. Sasuke gripped the chair so tightly his knuckles turned white.

"Is he dead?" This voice was unfamiliar, and Sasuke's eyes snapped open to see who it was.

His vision was blurry from the blood-_and tears_-so he couldn't see who spoke. He heard footsteps approaching the chair, and blinked to clear his vision. Slowly, the person approached. The first thing he noticed was the kunai pointed at him, followed by a black-clad arm, which turned to orange, which turned to-

Sasuke drew in a sharp breath. Naruto. He had grown since Sasuke had last seen him. He was taller... _beautiful_, the small voice whispered into his mind.

He was too weak. He couldn't run, and he couldn't fight.

"Naruto..." he whispered. His world went completely black.

--

_AN: Oh dear. Well? What's the verdict, dear readers? Do you like? Do you not like? I apoligize for any grammar, spelling, or stupid mistakes I may have made. No one wanted to beta it for me... -- feels rejected_

_I'll post another chapter if I get enough interest, and if I finish it xD_

_REVIEW PLEASE :3_

_-MotD_


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